Daniel gave an absent minded 'bye' to Sam as she headed toward the elevator and her lab, his attention on the top file folder he carried. The translation of the tablet that SG-3 had brought back from P1S-953 was proving to be particularly tricky. As he walked, Daniel studied the writing again, pulling a pencil from behind his ear to write down a phrase that was a possibility.
When he looked up he was surprised to see he'd reached his lab. Daniel wrinkled his nose sure he could smell coffee. He hoped he hadn't left the coffeemaker on *again*. The last time he'd done that General Hammond hadn't been too happy with the small fire that set off alarms all over the floor. No, Daniel shook his head at himself, he was sure he hadn't. Jack, Sam, and Teal'c had presented him with a coffeemaker with an automatic shutoff. Besides, he hadn't even been in his lab since last night and he'd been sitting by Jack's bed in the infirmary drinking Janet's coffee then.
Daniel juggled the file folders, digging for his keycard. Opening the door, he barely managed to hold on to the stack and then dropped them all at Jack's exuberant, "Hi, Dannyboy."
"Jack, give a guy a heart attack why don't you?" Daniel scowled at Jack as he knelt on the floor to pick up the scattered papers. His eyes narrowed watching Jack lifting a mug to his lips.
"Um, Jack, what are you drinking?" Daniel placed the hastily gathered papers on the nearest shelf and headed towards Jack who was currently spinning around on Daniel's chair.
"Nope, you can't have any." Jack held the mug above his head as Daniel reached for it. "It's mine."
"Uh, no, it would be mine, seeing as it's my lab you're in, my chair you're sitting in, and my mug you're drinking out of." Daniel stumbled as Jack spun the chair again, landing on his stomach on Jack's lap.
"Is not." Jack smiled at him beatifically, one hand coming to rest on Daniel's ass. "That's nice." Oh, now *this* was giving him ideas.
"Is." Daniel pushed himself back up, ignoring Jack's grunt as an elbow dug into his thigh.
"Is," Daniel finally succeeded in grabbing the mug. He sniffed it cautiously. Well it didn't have any alcohol in it. Smelled just like coffee, very, very strong coffee. "What is this?"
"Coffee." Jack spun on the chair once more, grabbing at Daniel's waist. "Come here, Danny."
"I don't want to." Daniel easily evaded Jack's lunge and headed towards his coffeemaker. He looked at the crumpled brown bag lying by the coffee maker and widened his eyes as he realized the implications. He turned slowly to find Jack watching him with a smile.
'Okay, okay,' Daniel took three slow deep breaths forcing himself to try to remain calm before he exploded. He wondered if he should call Doctor Fraiser.
"Jack, did you make this coffee?" He winced at the tone of his voice. He sounded as if he was talking to an errant toddler, which under the circumstances might not be too far off the mark.
"Yep. That's the second pot." Jack nodded vigorously.
"For crying out loud, Jack! How much did you use? Do you know how expensive this is? Jamaican Blue Mountain?"
"There's still some for you if you want it." Jack smiled as he walked unsteadily towards Daniel. "I'll share."
"Uh, no thanks, Jack." Daniel felt his stomach contract at the thought of drinking the near sludge that currently resided in his coffee pot. Another thought occurred to him. "Jack, does Doctor Fraiser know you're here?"
Jack's quickly averted eyes gave the answer.
"I'm guessing that's a no." Daniel sighed. Jack spun on the stool once again, a huge grin lighting his face.
"Jack." Daniel reached out and grabbed Jack's shoulders.
"What?" Jack looked confused and disappointed by Daniel's actions.
Daniel thought back to the previous day when SG-1 walked back through the Gate with a slightly sloshed Colonel. How was he to know that Jack would have a reaction to the tea that the Qnernons drank as part of every social interaction? Sam, Teal'c, and he didn't have the very odd reaction Jack did. Luckily Sam and Teal'c chalked up Jack's frequent patting of Daniel's ass to his inebriated state and didn't read anything more into it. At least Daniel hoped they weren't reading any more into Jack's wandering hands.
"Didn't Janet tell you that you were supposed to stay in the VIP room until I was ready to drive you home?"
Jack nodded and looked at his feet. He mumbled something that Daniel couldn't catch.
"I said it wasn't any fun without you there." Jack frowned up at him. "I missed you, Daniel."
"I missed you too, Jack." Daniel patted Jack's shoulder.
"Really, really, missed you." Jack held out his arms and puckered his lips.
"Oh, Daniel replied. "I had, no correction, I have work to do."
"Don't you love me anymore?" Jack asked dropping his arms and frowning again.
"What? Jack, we're on base." Daniel lowered his voice to a whisper. "I think maybe you should be quiet."
"Why?" Jack whispered back. "Oh, is it a surprise?"
Well, one thing Daniel could do was think on his feet. He smiled at Jack. Let his partner think they were co-conspirators. At least it would settle Jack down for a few minutes. Daniel gave one last longing look at the translation he was working on and the crumpled, no, make that, crumpled and very empty, bag of his best coffee and sighed. He picked up the phone and dialed Fraiser's direct number.
"Um, Janet?" he said, turning his back to Jack who was spinning on the chair again. "Could you come down to my office? I think we have a problem."
"He's what?" Daniel asked looking over Janet's head at Jack who was now intently studying Daniel's computer screen and trying to catch the little men running on the screen saver. He tugged on the good doctor's arm, pulling her further away from Jack and lowering his voice to a whisper.
"Drunk. At least that's the best analogy I can use." She stared up at Daniel.
"Well do something about it," Daniel said. "He's...he can't stay on base acting like this." He ducked his head afraid he might have said too much.
"Acting what? Amorous?"
Janet's eyes were sparkling with mischief as she added, "I saw him grabbing for your..."
"Um, okay." Daniel could feel his ears getting hot at her continued scrutiny. Janet was enjoying this way too much. "So what do you suggest I do?"
"Take him home. This is going to work itself out of his system--it's just going to take some time."
"Time?" Daniel hissed. "How much time?"
"I'm sure that by tomorrow afternoon, Colonel O'Neill will be fine," Janet said with supreme confidence. "He just needs to sleep it off."
"Sleep it off? How is he going to sleep? He just drank a pot of coffee that he made with a half pound of my Jamaican Blue Mountain--and you expect he's going to sleep it off?" Daniel was aware he was nearly yelling and he took a deep breath, putting his hands to his head and grabbing at his hair.
"The caffeine will leave his system eventually," Janet pointed out.
Daniel groaned and put his hand over his eyes.
"I'll inform the general that you won't be in for the next two days," Janet added. "And you have my number. You can call if anything seems out of the ordinary. Unless..."
"Unless what?" Daniel jumped on her words, hoping beyond hope that she had some miracle cure up her sleeve.
"Well, we could keep him in a VIP room."
Daniel looked over her shoulder at Jack who winked and blew him a kiss.
"Uh, no, um, no. Thanks for the offer, but I think taking Jack home is the best option." He gave a nervous smile and motioned for Janet to leave. Thank goodness for doctor-patient confidentiality. The thought of Sam catching wind of Jack's, hell, of *his* predicament was too terrible to contemplate. Oh she wouldn't dare tease Jack about it, he was her CO after all, but Sam had a wicked sense of humor and Daniel was sure a little blackmail wouldn't be beneath her. There were times he was very glad he'd been an only child--big sister Sam was almost too much to take at times.
Daniel sighed in relief as the security gates disappeared from his rear-view mirror. Thankfully their trip from the SGC had been uneventful. Jack seemed to think it had all been an espionage mission when Daniel warned him to be quiet and to keep his hands to himself. Jack was even quiet and subdued as they went to Daniel's car and left the base. Thank goodness for small favors, Daniel thought. He so hadn't wanted to explain Jack touching his crotch as they went through the security checkpoints.
"Daniel?" Jack whispered. "Can I talk now?"
Sorely tempted to say no, Daniel glanced over at Jack and sighed. How could he refuse when Jack looked so forlorn?
"Yeah, you can talk now." He braced himself, prepared for the onslaught, but Jack remained silent. Maybe, just maybe, the effects were already dissipating.
"FLINTSTONES, IT'S THE FLINTSTONES! THEY'RE THE MODERN STONEAGE FAMILY!"
Daniel slammed on the brakes as Jack bellowed out the opening song to the cartoon. He took a deep breath and pulled to the side of the road.
"What. Are. You. Doing?" he asked, gritting his teeth. God! His dentist was going to kill him.
Jack looked at him, his mouth open, and blinked. "You don't know the words? Ah Daniel. You really did have a deprived childhood." Jack reached over and patted Daniel's clenched hand.
"I know the words. Believe me, I know the words. I meant, why? Why are you singing?"
Jack shrugged. "I like to sing. The sun is shining. It's a day meant for singing."
Daniel stared out the windshield, conscious of the need to continue the slow, deep breaths. He thought of pointing out that Jack couldn't carry a tune if his life depended on it, but considering Jack's state at the moment, he feared he'd wind up with more pouting. Think, Daniel, think. He tapped his fingers on the steering wheel and then nodded once before looking at Jack again.
"Okay, okay. Singing is allowed, but you have to sing quietly. No yelling." When Jack looked hurt, he added, "I need to concentrate on my driving."
Relieved when that seemed to do the trick, Daniel signaled and pulled on the road again.
"The wheels on the car go round and round, round and round, round and round. The wheels on the car..."
"Um, Jack? Do you think maybe you could sing something else?"
"Yasureyoubetcha," Jack agreed with a smile. There was blessed silence for a moment and Daniel fervently hoped Jack's attention was diverted.
"Here I come to save the day!" Jack flung out an arm to the side, nearly clipping Daniel on the side of the head. "Mighty Mouse is on his way!"
He bit the inside of his lip. There was no way he was going to survive. None. Daniel suspected that in two days, when he didn't show up for work, they'd have to send someone out and they'd find him curled up in a little tiny ball, begging for someone to put him out of his misery. Maybe if Jack wouldn't be so loud he'd be able to handle the off-key singing. But then again...
"If I were a rich man, deedle deedle deedle deedle deedle deedle deedle dum..."
Or maybe not.
By the time Daniel turned onto Jack's street he'd been treated to at least five cartoon themes and three Broadway show tunes. He supposed he should be grateful for small favors such as the fact that Jack didn't actually remember the complete lyrics to any of the songs he began or that he didn't try opera. On the other hand, that meant listening to Jack was like listening to his partner click through the TV stations when he couldn't find anything he liked to watch.
"We're home," Daniel announced raising his voice over Jack's rendition of The Impossible Dream.
"So soon?" Jack stopped after a particular blood-curdling croon.
"Yeah." Daniel smiled and motioned for Jack to undo his seatbelt. "Go figure."
Jack was out of the car and at the door before Daniel managed to unclick his own seatbelt and take the key out of the ignition. Daniel got his own key for Jack's front door when Jack looked at him after patting down his khakis.
"I'll be back," Jack called as he headed towards the bedroom.
Daniel flopped down on the sofa, enjoying the momentary silence and peace. Maybe he could persuade Jack to take a nap or something. Exhausted at the thought of continuing to try to keep up with a hyper Jack, Daniel tilted his head back and stared up at the ceiling. With his luck Jack would decide they needed to have a Simpsons-watching marathon. He closed his eyes, listening to the sound of his breathing and the tick of the clock.
He shot up at the announcement and Daniel stared. At Jack. Jack who was standing in front of the fireplace naked. As in totally in the buff. No clothes, nothing, zilch, nyet, nada.
"Um, Jack?" Daniel got up from the sofa, hoping beyond hope that none of Jack's neighbors were able to see into the living room. "You're naked."
Jack gave him a look that implied Daniel was possibly the densest man on earth. "Well, duh. I was hot."
"Oh," because what, after all, could you say to that reasoning?
"It's probably not a good idea to stand here in the living room like that." Maybe trying to appeal to Jack's private nature would do the trick. "You know, Mrs. Patterson, she's always snooping."
"Afraid she'll want me after she sees me?" Jack grinned. "Maybe I should..."
Daniel grabbed his arm. "No, no. You shouldn't go out like that. You'll, uh, you'll catch a chill." When Jack stared at him, he continued. "Hot inside, cold outside."
"I know how we could warm up the outside." Jack moved closer, tilting his head and blowing on Daniel's neck. "You wanna do it on the roof?"
"On the roof?" Daniel was ashamed to hear the words come out as more of a squeak than his speaking voice. "No. I don't want to do it on the roof. And neither do you."
If Jack was in his right mind he'd have been mortified at his behavior. Jack, 'Mr. Sleep in Sweats and socks all year long no matter what the temperature' parading around naked through his house and suggesting they have sex on the roof. The mind boggled.
"No, you don't." Daniel congratulated himself on managing a short distraction. "You want to go back to the bedroom and put on a robe." He wanted to say put on sweats, but figured that would be pushing it. "And then you want to come to the kitchen where I'm going to fix us something to eat." Maybe food would help negate some of Jack's current caffeine overload behaviors.
"Anything you want, lover-boy." Jack grinned and winked. He walked back towards the bedroom and Daniel watched. He couldn't help it--oh God, please let him be imagining that Jack was swaying his hips. Jack stopped at the base of the steps and turned, blowing a kiss.
"Kill me now," Daniel muttered as he went into the kitchen. Did coffee have aphrodisiac powers that he couldn't recall? Because he'd been around a drunken Jack before and he'd never been this...playful.
He rummaged around in the freezer and found a pizza that didn't look like it had been in there too long. There was no way he could risk phoning out for delivery, and grocery shopping had been on their 'to do' list. Pizza in the oven, Daniel glanced at the coffee maker sitting on the counter with longing. It wasn't fair. But the risk was too great.
Sighing, he turned away and got out a can of frozen orange juice concentrate. He'd just have to make do with the juice.
"Hey there," Jack whispered in his ear, nearly causing Daniel to spill the juice he'd just mixed up in the blender. One nibble on his neck made him shudder.
He turned half-way, glad to see Jack had put on a robe and a pair of sweat pants.
The timer rang and Jack grinned at him.
"Pizza's ready," Daniel said, pulling away.
"Who needs food?" Jack whispered. Daniel almost dropped the pizza as Jack reached out and squeezed his ass.
Daniel looked at the pizza. Damn, and he was hungry too. On the other hand, maybe giving Jack what he wanted would kill two birds with one stone and then Daniel could have his pizza and his coffee. Sex always made Jack sleepy. He'd just have to cross his fingers it would work this time.
"You're right," Daniel said putting the pizza on top of the stove. "Who does?"
"Not me. That's for sure." Jack pushed Daniel towards the refrigerator, tugging at Daniel's shirt and trying to unsnap his jeans.
"Nope. Not here," Daniel said. He was willing to indulge in some acrobatics with Jack but there was no way in hell he was going to do it in the kitchen. He'd never be able to cook there again if Sam and Teal'c, or even worse, General Hammond, came for a meal.
"Fine. Fine. Let's get this show on the road," Jack agreed, shifting from foot to foot. "Man cannot live on pizza alone."
"You okay?" Jack asked pressing Daniel's shoulders into the mattress.
Daniel managed to get one arm out from under Jack's weight and pushed back at his partner. "I was until you pushed me down and jumped on me."
"Yes, oh. Now get. Off. Me," Daniel grunted as Jack rolled over onto his back. Damn Jack's elbows were bony. Daniel rubbed at his diaphragm and sat up. "At least let me get undressed."
"I'm gonna watch," Jack sing-songed as Daniel stood. "And do it slowly."
"Slowly," Daniel repeated and began to peel off his T-shirt, conscious of Jack watching his every move. God, how did women ever strip in public? Daniel could feel the tips of his ears burning and ducked his head. He much preferred his usual way of undressing or Jack undressing him--fast, furious and oh yeah, fast.
He glanced over at Jack who was staring at him as if Daniel was the most fascinating thing in the world. As he stared back, Jack gave a slow, lazy smile and touched himself.
The hell with slow. It had been long enough. And although he hadn't wanted to start anything they couldn't finish on base, in the car, or even in the kitchen, Daniel had to admit he was more than ready now.
He tossed his shirt in the corner, not caring that Jack would gripe about it when he came back to his senses, and nearly tripped over his feet as he pushed down his jeans and briefs and attempted to get in the bed. He kicked the jeans and underwear half under the bed, cursing as he stubbed his toe on the night table.
"Come to bed," Jack said, patting the sheets. "I can kiss it and make it better."
"You aren't kissing my feet, Jack," Daniel muttered. He didn't care how much of the mood he was in, foot fetishes were out.
"Uh huh," Jack agreed. He slid one hand over Daniel's chest and then up his arm. "I can find plenty of other places to kiss."
Daniel arched his back as Jack licked his collarbone. "Yeah." He groaned as Jack blew on the wet skin. "Oh. Oh. That's good." Daniel felt a shiver move up his spine when Jack moved further down and did the same lick and blow action on Daniel's nipples.
"You like it, huh?" Jack murmured against Daniel's skin.
"I like..." Daniel gasped as Jack moved even lower and turned his attention to Daniel's cock. Okay, a few thousand brain cells might have just blown themselves to smithereens as Jack..."Oh." Daniel lifted his head, able to see Jack for a second before he dropped his head back onto his pillow with a thud. He gripped the sheet as Jack continued his slow, methodical licking.
"God, Jack, just do it." Daniel thrust his hips upward as Jack touched his balls and stroked them, allowing the sacs to roll gently across his fingers.
"Patience," Jack said, his breath ghosting across Daniel's straining cock. "All good things."
Daniel stared at the ceiling, Jack's continuing combination of tonguing and squeezing about ready to send him over the edge. He didn't know how much longer he'd be able to hang onto control of his body, and the need for Jack to just do it, take him in his mouth, to relieve the aching need and urgency, grew in intensity.
Jack shifted on the bed, moving into a better position. Daniel felt Jack twist and some of his partner's weight fell across his thighs. Moving his hands to either side of Daniel's hips, Jack nuzzled his groin. Daniel lifted his head again, smiling as he could see the top of Jack's head, the silver hair all spiked with sweat. He shifted to allow Jack better access and leaned back again, pushing up against Jack's weight. And then...
Daniel squirmed as Jack's hair tickled his belly. What the...
Oh no. No, no...nooo! Please tell him this wasn't happening. A slight snore and a bubble of warm saliva dripping on his stomach confirmed Daniel's suspicions.
"Jack!" Daniel yelled and nudged Jack's head with one hand. "Wake up!"
"He'll crash hard." He could hear Janet's voice in his head as her prediction came back to haunt him.
"Yeah, hard all right," Daniel muttered. He pushed out from under Jack, making his way into the bathroom hunched over as if he was a hundred years old rather than shy of forty. "And while we're on the subject of hard...what about me?" he muttered to himself while he turned on the shower.
Daniel stepped in the tub, letting the warm water sluice over his head and back. He grabbed the soap, lathering his hands and then leaned against the cool tiles. God, it was like he was fifteen again and taking a shower at his foster parents', afraid someone was going to walk in and demand an explanation as to what he was doing showering in the middle of the night.
He sighed in relief as he closed his fist around his cock, finally gaining the release he craved. Pushing himself upright once more, Daniel began to scrub the rest of his body, short rough strokes, allowing his anger--was it anger, he wondered as he thought about the absurdity of the whole situation. He thought of Jack spinning on the chair, the serenade he'd been given on the way home, Jack's eagerness to get naked and his sheer enthusiasm for the evening's entertainment. Daniel stood in the shower, the water cascading down his body, and felt the laughter start deep in his belly before he had to grip the handrail to keep from falling as he began laughing so hard tears came to his eyes. If his life was a TV show, no one would believe it.
Daniel dug into the white bag, pulling out an apricot pastry. Thank goodness Jack was still asleep and he'd managed to get to his favorite bakery and back. After last night, Daniel had decided he deserved whatever he wanted. He took a bite of the pastry and then opened one of the bags of coffee he'd bought on the trip. He inhaled deeply, letting the rich earthy smell invade his nostrils. He took his time filling the coffee pot, enjoying the ritual and the quiet.
Quiet. Quiet was good. Stretching his arms over his head, Daniel tried to get the knots out of his shoulders and the kinks out of his lower back. That was what he got for spending a night on Jack's couch. Jack couldn't make it easy on him last night, oh no. Nice and warm from the shower, Daniel had gone back to bed, planning on reading an article or two from an archaeology journal before settling down for a nice long sleep. But Jack's snores were so loud, Daniel had to leave the room and put cotton in his ears before he was able to fall asleep in the living room.
After pouring himself a big mug of coffee, Daniel sat down at the kitchen table, browsing through one of Jack's sporting goods catalogs while he ate a second pastry. The sound of a muffled curse and then shuffling feet got his attention. Daniel looked up from a page of fishing rods that had two very expensive models circled with question marks beside them to see the love of his life stumble into the kitchen with his eyes half-closed.
Janet hadn't said anything about a possible hangover and Daniel was debating on whether or not to say anything when Jack opened the refrigerator and pulled out the jug of orange juice.
"Get a glass," he warned.
Jack gave him a look and then proceeded to take a large long gulp right out of the jug. Wiping his mouth with the back of his hand, Jack came over to sit at the table. "Been up long?"
Daniel shrugged. "Long enough."
"Oh." Jack took another swig of the orange juice and then pulled the white bakery bag close, digging out a cinnamon bun. "Uh, Daniel?"
Watching as Jack systematically dissected the roll, Daniel waited.
"I seem to remember...did I really try to jump your bones on base?" Jack took a deep breath and looked straight at Daniel, his expression one of dread.
"Yeah. Yeah you did." Daniel got up and brought a glass to the table before Jack could drink more of the juice. "You also owe me two bags of Jamaican Blue Mountain."
"You drank my stash, Jack. You replace it."
Jack held his head in his hands. "Geeze! Doc was there too, wasn't she?"
"For part of it." Daniel couldn't keep from smiling as he remembered Janet's wide eyes. "Oh and don't forget the serenade on the way home."
Jack groaned. "Please tell me I didn't." He looked at Daniel again. "I did."
Daniel nodded. "You did at least wait until we got in the house to get naked though, for which I am eternally grateful. I didn't know how I'd explain that to your neighbors."
Jack smiled. "But we did wind up in the right place eventually, I'm guessing." He reached over and touched the back of Daniel's hand. "I remember you, naked, in bed. And us, touching, and..."
The temptation to let Jack know just what had happened in that bed was strong and maybe one day he would. After all, having your partner fall asleep right when he was ready to...well it did something to a guy's ego and none of it was good. But Jack was smiling at him, his brown eyes warm, clear, and dancing with a mischief that had nothing to do with caffeine and alien plants but everything to do with Jack and Daniel.
"It was great, Jack." Daniel said, smiling back. "Just like always." And he raised his coffee cup in salute to his lover while ruefully shaking his head. Yep, this was their life. And he wouldn't trade it for anything.
|Summary:||Daniel deals with the after effects of a mission.|