Sitting at my desk here, not concentrating on what I oughta be doing; not that I ever found doing paperwork easy; right now though it's freaking impossible. The only thing I wanna be doing I can't and so here I sit ....no, I'm hiding out here. And why, you ask, would a Special Ops Colonel feel the need to hide? Cause if I saw Daniel just now I'd either hit him, or grab him and kiss him. Seeing as either's outta the question it's easier to hide. Not that I'd ever admit that, of course.
Next question would be why I'd wanna hit, or kiss, the peaceful archaeologist? Same reason; said archaeologist is the most exasperating, annoying, frustrating, infuriating, gorgeous, wonderful, honourable -- did I mention gorgeous, man with the most beautiful blue eyes in which you could drown and smile as you slip to your death. Like I said, exasperating. And I love the man to distraction.
That's the crux of the problem I suppose. He could so easily distract me and I can't let him. But it's getting harder and harder. Like today.
We go out to PP3 something-or-other and Daniel sees a pillar near the gate. Don't look much but it was hidden by this huge honking tree when the MALP sent the pretty pictures back and so naturally he's gotta go and investigate. I go with him to watch him. Doesn't need it, he says; but then he always says that and he and I, and everyone else, knows he does need me with him. Think he says that just to bug me, likes to rile me. Y'know. Not that I mind, kinda like the banter back and forth, especially when he gets pissy and those eyes of his sparkle and his face flushes. Oooh, that goes straight to my groin. Shouldn't be watching him like I do, not on purpose anyhow and then the little colonel wouldn't get so interested. Didn't start out on watching him on purpose; he totally caught me out. I mean he's my best friend fer crying out loud, and suddenly he's giving me a hard-on like you wouldn't believe.
Ain't never been one to look a gift horse in the mouth and it's been quite a while since anyone could make me feel the way he does, so I let it happen. Knew it was wrong of course, but dammit to hell I'm only human. I could keep it under control, at least that's what I told myself. Just a little healthy lust. Only I shoulda known better. This is Daniel we're talking about and he never does anything halfway, not even when he doesn't know he's doing it! Before I knew what'd happened I was trapped, well and truly caught, hook, line and sinker. Not just in lust but in love.
Last time I was in love I married her. Her. Not that I'm saying I'm spooked by loving him 'cause I ain't. Always been bisexual and my first love was a man, but that was before I joined up. I've fooled around a bit with guys since, before I was married and after she left, but never anything serious. This is different, very different. I'm totally in love with Daniel. What a sap but I don't care. I've loved him for years as a friend and I still don't know when I fell in love with him, suspect it's been growing for some time and something triggered it in my conscious mind. I wasn't even all that surprised when I knew I loved him, guess it was inevitable and at least my subconscious knew it. Whatever; I do and that's that.
Where was I? Oh yeah, on PP3, watching Daniel do his thing with that pillar. It was quiet and peaceful; Teal'c and Carter were nearby collecting samples. I settled myself, P90 at the ready, sitting on a large rock just to the right of where Daniel was kneeling to study the squiggles on the slab of rock. He was muttering to himself and scribbling in his ever-present notebook; made me smile. I was watching him; and there was that problem again. Not watching over him, just watching him. The way he moved, the way his muscles rippled when he reached up to trace something, the way his fingers touched a particular bit of writing. The way he'd nibble the end of his pencil when he was thinking, the way his mouth pursed and his brow wrinkled. My mind drifted imagining those muscles rippling as he reached over to touch me, the long fingers tracing my body, the mouth pursed as it readied to kiss my mouth, the brow wrinkled in concentration as his cock penetrated my ass...fuck!
Then two things happened at once. Daniel began to speak.
"Jack, I think we should be careful here, there's..."
The rest was cut off as the sound of staff blasts and P90s. Rudely interrupted my Daniel watching. I grabbed Daniel and we ran back to where Teal'c and Sam were working near the gate.
Cut a long story short; a bunch of Jaffa had come through causing Sam and Teal'c to defend themselves. They'd taken cover behind the DHD to try and give us a way out if we could regroup and keep the Jaffa at bay while we managed to dial out. When Danny and I reached the edge of the trees we could see them hunkered down and the Jaffa were in two positions. A couple of them were behind a large boulder along the edge of the gate platform and a couple of others were hidden along the line of trees. Daniel had his handgun out and he looked to me for orders. This was one of those times when Daniel would follow orders implicitly.
I told him to run for the DHD while I gave covering fire, knowing that as soon as I opened fire the others would shoot in support. He did as I asked and though I had confidence we could escape; I still couldn't help the fear that gnawed at my gut as Daniel ran out under the 'guns' of the enemy. Teal'c and Sam did their part perfectly and protected Daniel as he ran and slid behind the DHD. As soon as he got there he began to dial out, trusting us to cover him. This was a well-practiced routine and we pulled it off yet again. While he dialled, the others continued to give covering fire both to Danny and me as I made my run for safety, firing my P90 all the way. Even as I slid behind the DHD the wormhole was open and Danny was already running for the Gate. We soon followed covering each other's backs.
Okay, we all made it back safe, not so much as a scratch. Daniel didn't do anything wrong, in fact he did everything just right. So why did I want to hit him? Because I really wanna kiss him and it's his freaking fault that he is so gorgeous and so fucking clueless and I'm just a frustrated bastard blaming him 'cause I'm stymied. I'm the one who deserves the punishment.
I just wish he wasn't so blind cause I think, maybe, if he looked, really looked; he might see something he wanted.
|Genres:||Pre-Slash, Romance, Vignette|
|Summary:||Jack is deliberating his position on SG1 with reference to his relationship with Daniel.
Author's Chapter Notes:
Just Jack thinking, always dangerous.
Thanks to my Beta, Gateroller!
Thanks to my Beta, Gateroller!